Calgon, Take Me Away!

Never mind March Madness, June easily claims the madness title.

Please excuse my rant, but I’m going to say what each and every parent out there who handles the family calendar is thinking.

Enough is enough!

It begins with "end of year" and ends with celebration, need the following supplies, makeup game, collection for gift or something similar. 

The truth is  I’ve gone over the edge and I really need to know where to locate a gallon of Calgon right away. You remember the commercials, right?  Woman in bathtub surrounded by flowers as she mumbles “Calgon, take me away!”

I don’t remember the beginning of the commercial, but in my mind, it must have been June and she must have gotten one too many emails (or phone calls - there was no email back then) from a room-mom, coach or somebody in charge asking her to do just one more thing in June!

Don’t get me wrong.

I love going into the classroom to see the play, look through the progress folio, listen to poetry and more, but must they pack it all in between June 10 and June 17?

I also realize that with five kids, exponentially I will get more requests. But the truth is, I want to wish away June and I am not alone.  

When I have shared honestly with others in Colella's or at Hooray for Books how I’m feeling, every mom has emphatically chimed in with excessive head nods of agreement.

So I will be the one to say what everyone else is thinking. ENOUGH ALREADY! Taken one at a time, none of these requests are outrageous, but add them all up for a family of one, two or five and no parent can keep up.

In just two short weeks I have been asked to donate to three classroom funds for teachers' gifts, five end-of-year sports gifts for coaches,  pay for a field-day shirt so my son could match his class and buy $75 worth of lax scratch tickets.

I supplied Hoodsie cups for 24, was asked to make a meal of my family’s heritage to feed 25, donate eight real tea lights for science and bring in fruit to feed 30.  

I attended my son’s first communion, a fourth-grade student spotlight, the state track meet, one senior award night, one track banquet, one Boy Scout Leadership night, one high-school graduation, one retirement party and  four graduation parties on top of our own.

I made it to one chorus and two band concerts, spent an hour at a kindergarten ice-cream social, helped out at just one field day staffing the fun parachute station (declined the other three field days) and attended three lacrosse and two baseball games.

At halftime of the games I went for a run because I signed up for the Sharon Timlin race and need to get in shape and the only time I have to run is during halftime!

To top it off, I need to help supply snacks for the end of the year lacrosse tourney and will spend Father’s Day at a jamboree with 359 other dads I barely know instead of my own. All this while taking care of the home front, keeping up with laundry and food shopping and trying to do this thing called work!

So I am back to my original statement. Calgon, take me away!

I’ve hit my limit which takes a lot for me. 

I’m not sure how any working parent can get productive time in with all the events during the day. I’m not sure how anyone can get anything done with so many demands on our time.

The guilt of not attending is tough, so I’m here to remind teachers that April and May are both glorious months for having parents in - no need to save it all for June!

I guess I could homeschool and eliminate sports. On the upside, since I’ve spent so much at Stop & Shop this month, my gas points really added up and I got 90 cents off each gallon at the pump yesterday!

In closing, have a relaxing end of the year and Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there! Me, I will be searching for a full bottle of Calgon.

Mary Murphy is the mother of five kids age 6 to 18 and the owner of Hooray for Books. Follow her on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/hoorayforbooks


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